intuition

confused.. now im where i dont want to be.

im sorry.

Rushin' way too fast,
Why do I always do it?

it just doesn't feel right.

~Esh~

Happy face

all u pessimists listen to this song. its niiice.
yesterday was the river cruise. and i was better for it!! i dressed up as an elf ( i thought my hat with pasted on leaves was pretty damn good). but other ppl had really funky outfits. Reece for one looked exactly like a girl..hairspray and all. All the cardboard cutting and hard slaving away at tony's tv set paid off! i think locky's one was the best though coz he painted himself black to be 'lemurman'-.-". just wish the boat wasnt so small (makes gagging noise).

Xiao, Wei Hao, Abby and Courtney coudnt get tickets which sucked coz they would have loved it, esp wei hao ;) all those guys in short shorts hahaha.

i really felt like dancing last night. good thing the music was pretty fun. lots of hip hop! and no i didnt drink...for all you people who are STILL onto me about a couple of weeks ago. leaving for home now!!

im really glad i went.

~Esh~


I woke up this morning,
The sunshine was shining
I put on my happy face
I'm living, I'm able,
I'm breathing, I'm grateful
To put on my happy face

ANTM addict

i know its ditzy, girly, blonde. basically everything i swore id never be . but i am so addicted to America's Next Top Model.

you would think that models have it easy. they just have to be pretty and let people take photos of them and voila..covergirl contract and a bath full of cash. but no. the judges are so critical! its not enough to be stunning, you have to have the attitude, the personality, the je ne sais quoi. it takes a lot of guts to put ureself out there.

i dont think i could ever do that. youre relying on your looks to support you...i guess its thrilling, its a rush, but its not reliable. i couldnt live like that but i dont think i would ever get to lol.

anyways, the cold which i have been avoiding has finally caught me. im really excited about the river cruise so im making myself get better!

i really love it here honestly. its not as stunning as st georges or as well know as trinity. but its got a great group of people who make you laugh...or sometimes make you want to say 'SHUT UP! I HAVE AN 8 O'CLOCK LECTURE TOMORROW!' its awesome.

i am a table tennis apprentice. better watch out tobs...i cant counter the slice now and ure gay buggy whip crap.

~Esh~

p.s i still hate calc

to make me feel better

ive been stuck with a really bad sore throat for a couple of days now. which i think is finally getting better thanks to chinese medicine, caz's green tea and vit c. im feeling better since the last time i posted too.

the weekend is always so much more relaxed. its my first full weekend here actually and i cant wait to try out hot breakfast! hanging out with tony yesterday was good :) except for that movie...movies just keep getting longer and longer.

WARNING: the good shepherd is confusing and long. I think ive had my share of Matt Damon for a while.

Really felt like going out last night so summer came and got me only to tell me that her, caz and bren had already tried getting into mexicana but they needed 1)tickets 2) a couple more months.

it sucks to be 17..and born in december.

so we went to pick up goonfaces, walked to trinity and back to tommy.. and to st georges. nothing on. i guess everyone was at mexicana...so basically the night ended with about 5 of us in the hallway talking about how sad it was that we were sitting drinking tea and eating packet noodles on a friday night. lol.
and i finally figured out which one is lenard and which one is geoffrey! phew..

caz was knocked out so i went to watch heroes with bren. who fell asleep half way through lol! and yeah. what a fun night..that has to be the most exciting night ever -.-"

im so good. ive actually studied today.

~Esh~

i cant believe we got lost in the city. ive lived here for three years and im still getting lost on the way to the bus station! how embarassing!!!

in the end

i shouldnt have expected anything.

my fault.

i expected too much from you.

im lucky to be here. i guess ure not as lucky.
i felt sorry for me, i felt sorry for you. now i feel stupid.

thanks

~Esh~

What its meant to be
Will eventually
be a memory...

summer sun

how hot has it been? its really crazy. kita if you are reading this..you better do something about it! my first tut is in 45 mins and im pretty excited coz i actually like linguistics! unlike calc -.-"

had a cny dinner yesterday, even though cny is over. pretty fun but the dining hall doesnt have air con! or fans actually... i feel sorry for the dragon dancers. they were amazing though. food was ok i guess. up to the usual currie hall standards!

im moody, havent been getting enough sleep. sorry people who have to see me.

hope y'all enjoying uni!

~Esh~


Tony- |
Esha- |

week 2- chowder

chowder has to be the worst part of living at currie. luckily for me..mr poon is extremely fond of it. he even went up for seconds!!! crazy calculus loving chowder hoover.

anyways..moving on from the revolting chowder to....something less revolting. i was waiting for a shower when i had this thought. what makes people attracted to each other?

its strange because i find myself knowing that i SHOULD be attracted to this person because hes the kind of guy i talk about wishing i had. and then hes there. and then its just an anti climax. how sad.

but then theres normal average person who i meet and laugh at and i just love him so much. i know them the same...both good people. but why cant i be attracted to mr hot guy? am i sick? am i blind? or is it the toby theory..the toby theory doesnt really come into effect though. they both smell ok.

its actually really frustrating. annoying.
its difficult. living with them is not easy.

the end

i hate calculus
~Esh~

just emotion taking me over